Dear Anonymous-
Sometimes we have to make changes in our lives for the better that can seem very painful at the time. After searching your feelings and discovering what it is that YOU really need and after considering what responsibilities you may have to small children or dependants or whoever and providing that those in question can stand on their own two feet ?… well... I think you have already made up your mind haven't you- by the manner of your question a part of you has already given you the answer.
Families and close personal attachments can at times be fraught with Karmic problems and subtleties that are impossible to resolve without proper in depth study and analysis but broadly speaking, in the end we must fight for our own sense of identity, of who we are; our true place in life! To Follow that dream or fulfill that Spiritual longing, especially if the dream IS of a Spiritual nature. The Spiritual Life must take precedence over all other aspects of your Life.
A person came to me with a similar problem. After much talk and analysis it was realized that he would either cut and run directly towards the "light" that he thought would bring him inner joy regardless. Or still go toward that Light but with the idea that after finding then being bathed in that Light (enlightenment) to bring that light back home so that all could benefit by it. To be Shared by all. He chose the latter but we cannot always know the intricacies of Karmic relationships, sometimes times we have to just go with our gut instinct.
The reason we are connected to certain individuals through family ties or whatever is because we have Karma to work out. The best ways to work out difficult Karma is through love in all its aspects. Kindness, consideration, understanding, forgiveness etc.
When we undertake Spiritual Journeys we have to sometimes leave to come "home". The Spiritual Path is the most important journey you will ever make and it may not necessarily be easy and you will need great determination.
Here is a short Tarot reading regarding your question: The atmosphere is one of making truce, backing down and oppression; Before you embark on a new venture you should take some time for rest and meditation, In this rest and contemplation you will be helped,
receiving consultation from God or a Higher source to help you cope with a difficult experience. You have an insatiable quest for knowledge but you need answers to deep seated questions and are not contented with run of the mill, facile responses.
From a spiritual standpoint You are moving gently toward a place of self-initiation. Being aware of the three worlds, you seek for the balance that only true knowledge of the Master within can bring. When we seek for the overself we must be wary of our actions, in case we ride roughshod over people or impose our values and will over them. Bringing future negative karma.
Apart from the advice offered here, there is also a suggestion that you may obtain some expert advice from someone who has strong moral values, who you might not seem very comfortable with at first, with an air authority but who is reliable and may offer solutions. A person who is used to making decisions. Maybe a doctor, A lawyer or priest.
There has been a time when a certain relationship has felt more like a battlefield. There is much struggle or battle around you. In order to emerge intact or on top of the situation, you must use your will-power and inner strength. This already has been tiring and has required much mental endurance and stamina. This period is passing and you know that you must fight for what you believe in.
If you have suffered illness there is suggestion of recovery after a period of convalescence.
Draw on your on own will and rectitude and you WILL NOT fail. The cards indicate that you will beat the odds despite having feelings that it is too big a mountain to climb. Get all negative thoughts out of your head because success is more assured than you realize.
God Bless.
